Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Two Ducks Discussing Politics

As two mallards drift across a pond in a popular park, they strike up a conversation.

Duck 1:  I don't know, I just can't support the government anymore.

Duck 2: How do you mean?

D1: I mean that it's flawed and we should go back to a survival of the fittest.

D2: Umm, we're already doing that survival thing, we're ducks in nature.

D1: Right, but I mean a REAL survival.  No more handouts, especially for immigrants.

D2: What immigrants?  We live in a pond near a playground.  And by "handouts" do you mean that bread they bring?  Fuck you I'll take your bread then.

D1: And that's whats wrong with the system!  You shouldn't get special treatment just because you have more ducklings than me!  I earn everything I get.

D2: You can't claim that bread dropped by that two year old as "earning".  That's the same kid who crapped his pants because he stood up too fast.

D1: Whatever.  You certainly can't argue that we need a total overhaul.

D2: But you hate change.  The last time they cut the grass different you lost your mind.

D1: This isn't about me!  This is about our rights as citizens!

D2: Do we get rights?  We're domesticated water fowl, I think we're lucky to be smart enough to avoid being where hunters go.

D1: Whatever, I can't talk to you like this.

D2: Fine dude, but that rich family is back, I'm getting me some of that sweet honey bread!

D1: Ohh, the honey bread people are back.  Move aside Commie!

D2: Capitalist jerk.

It's a smart duck because he's dressed nice.

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