So I went to go see “Horrible Bosses”, that comedy starring Jason Bateman, Charlie Day, and Jason Sudeikis, and it seemed like it was going to be a fun ride.
The premise is as follows: Nick (Bateman), Dale (Day), and Kurt (Sudeikis) all suffer at the hands of their respective bosses. During a night out at their favorite bar they decide to kill their bosses and end their misery. Enter Motherfucker Jones (Jamie Foxx), a certified badass who instructs them how to do the deed. The hilarity ensues.
At least, I assume hilarity ensues. Right after the trio paid Motherfucker Jones, some guy two rows in front of me starting talking on his cell phone. His cell phone in a movie theater! Against my friend’s say, I politely asked the man to hang up his phone. He waved me off. So I asked him again, and this time he turned around and gave me the finger. So I threw my box of candy at his head.
|Colin Farrel as a bad boss.|
When the protagonists begin staking out the first boss’s house, I’m throwing the cell phone guy into one of the hand rails on the theater stairs. It didn’t daze him, because as I went for the rib kick, he caught me by the ankle and knocked me down, dragging me out into the lobby.
After five minutes of just dirty, down and out brawling, mall security shows up and he gets a cheap shot to my nuts. I black out and come to smacking him in the face with a fired taser gun, and I suddenly felt an electric current surging through me and noticed prongs sticking out of my skin. When I stopped being numb the cops-real cops not mall security- dragged me off and I slept on a cot next to a guy who called himself “Razer”.
While my buddy bailed me out he told me the movie was funny overall, and balanced the story well, but sort of wraps everything up a little fast. He gave it a four out of five stars, and I’m banned from the theater for life.