Friday, September 7, 2012

Times you probably should not drink

Life is rough.  You go through the motions and the only medicine to ease the pain of existence is alcohol!  But beer, wine, and liquor are not always the right answer.  There are dozens, literally DOZENS of scenarios where drinking is inappropriate.  Following are a samples of those dozens.

Taxes:  Taxes are stressful, so it's only natural to have a few drinks to clam your nerves.  Never mind that any mistakes made on these forms will determine how much money you're given or due to pay.  And never mind the fact that people tend to make more mistakes when they drink.  I just worry about that hangover coming on the same day when taxes are actually due.

Organizing your house:  So you have to clean out the closet, organize your desk, and rearrange the living room?  Sure a glass or two of wine will help you get motivated, but if you indulge too much then you wind up laying across your desk that is now in the living room, watching tv upside down and wearing three coats you found in your closet.

Writing thank you letters: Now no one likes doing these, but they are vital  Think about how the room spins when you get too drunk, do you want to try and hand write anything?  Never mind the letters, try writing your own name.  You can't?  And that's why you don't write thank you letters drunk

Meeting new people: What better way to meet new people than when hammered?  You can't quite pronounce any words, you're louder than you should be, and you keep hitting on that girl who was clearly introduced as the host's girlfriend.  Seriously, drink some water, rummy.

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