Thursday, August 30, 2012

I Must Persevere

I must persevere.  I must persevere past my shortcomings, faults, and defects.

Even though I don't own a car.  A car I used to have but crashed into a school.  I must persevere beyond having to ride the bus even though I refuse to wear anything besides sweatpants and a Hello Kitty shirt two sizes too small.  Even though I have chronic flatulence due to me eating four bowls of chili for breakfast.  I must persevere.

I must persevere despite this Hooters banning me for what they called "rude behavior".  Behavior caused by being too drunk off three pitchers of beer, so I order only two pitchers.  I only weigh 115 pounds, but I will persevere to drink both pitchers.

I must persevere to eat the "Mega-Ton Combo" 50 wing order with "Mega-Ton" hot sauce and choose to ignore that last time I ate this order.  The last time this order was placed cops had to show up.  I was involved, but I must persevere past that event.  Even though I sprayed hot sauce in my own eyes and took my sweatpants off last time, I must persevere

I must persevere past the urge to slap the waitress on the ass.  I wish I had persevered to wash my hands first, for now she has a hot sauce hand print on her butt.  Even though I think it's funny, her boyfriend/bouncer decides to punch me then throw me out of the Hooters.  I must persevere past the wounds sustained from this altercation.

I will persevere.  At least until I pull my dick out at an Applebee's again.

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